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Hey, Dolls! I was so AVERAGE while with Anna. How lovely! Today, we got our Ouija board to work while the parents were out. Today, we bought me about two black shirts and a black skirt. Today, I told my mommy I'm gonna be "super-scary-awesome goth chick" for sophomore year. Today, I found out my crush didn't move. Today, I was also told that J.R. tried a while ago to put a "super-powerful" demon in my room that was supposed to cause misery about three months ago. Funny, these have been the best few months so far.
Yesterday I came home from Anna's house. Yesterday, we tried 3 times and the Ouija board didn't work. Yesterday, Anna spent the night.
The day before that I went to Anna's. We watched The Last Exorcism. It wasn't that scary. I only jumped at a couple parts.

It was all really fun. I love feeling alive around my friends. I love being able to take the gloves I bought before going to Anna's off  and not have a gasp come out of the other person. Anna knows that cutting has a reason. She understands.
I'll become all caught up with you guys' blogs...soon. Haha, maybe not today or tomorrow, though. Today, I'm kinda tired. Tomorrow, we're seeing if Anna can spend the night after this thing where I might be able to see my crush who doesn't know I have a crush on him. I'm so happy, though. Sweet tea and Nos mix. It's delish.
I love being active. I haven't really weighed myself at home. The scale at Anna's said up near 140. I'm hoping to anything out there that it's not like that. I'm scared I wouldn't be able to stand that and would start super restricting.
You know, I kind of miss eating little. It gave balance to life.
NO! Alex must be stronger this time. Everything is getting better. There is no more excuse there. No more J.P. saying at 5'3" and 95 pounds that she's fat. No more J.R. telling me all my worst fears. Dad's not even telling me to not eat. He's telling me I puke it up. Funny. I've never once purged. He even said it around Anna.
If there's no excuse, no reason, no right for me to do it, then why? Why do I wanna feel empty? Why do I want to stare into the mirror, watching as I get sicker and sicker? I see a pretty young lady when I stare into the mirror. I wanna be tiny, though.
When you see me, I want your head to turn, dear crush of mine.
When you see me, I want you to worry, dear teachers.
When you see me, Mommy and Daddy, I want you to see the pain of six years.
But these aren't good reasons to not eat. So why the fuck do I giggle and smile when my tummy is empty, when I'm so hungry?
I'm not scared anymore. Too confused.
Also, J.P. bothered me about her copy of Crank back. I was laughing over it, but now... I'm gonna be stronger and not cut. I'm gonna be better than before.
Oh...and the other day, I can't remember when, but I, well, erm, I burned myself. My wrist, my shin, the pain was delish. I do realize it's bad to give yourself second degree burns. I wasn't really thinking or something.

Skinny Little Me: Thank you for reading! =3 I don't care if you don't comment on every single post. And thank you for that reminder. ^^ I hope you have a pleasant day.


Lottie: My mom hates Juno. That nearly blew my mind. Wicca's really a commitment, though. I would consider myself really bad at it. So's Anna. She into it lately for all the hexes. Which are bad. I'm into it for that heart-racing excitement I get for anything my parents would hate.

P.S. Tomorrow is Friday. I'm messing up. I'm not eating more than 300. I want to remember the old days where I loved this. I need to remember why I need to get better.

P.S.S. I'm gonna rename the blog at some point. Maybe something like "The (Almost) Completely True Story Of Alex" because that sounds funny and sarcastic. If I ever get famous, that's what I'm gonna publish my journal under. Try to pass it off as fiction, but you guys will know the difference.  Also, go listen to I Feel Like Dancin' by All Time Low. It's so fun to dance to and to listen to.

P.S.S.S Too many S's. But I hope he isn't drunk when I see him tomorrow.